CYG Days 1-6

Day 6: What Not to Say

No one has said anything really terrible or insensitive to me about Julian. This was the one (well-meaning) comment that hurt. A neighbor who we don't know but who had seen me waddling up and down the street when I was super-pregnant yelled this across the street when Taison and I were out on a walk.

Day 5: Memorial

Julian has trees and a star named for him, and a birth certificate on file with the state department of health (not all states offer to issue one for stillborn babies-we're lucky to live in one that does). He also sent us his own memorial-a full double rainbow that was visible over the ocean at Martha's Vineyard for almost an hour.

Day 4: Most Treasured Item

I most treasure the photos I have of Julian. Sometimes I feel like this whole experience was just a dream, which makes me sad. It's comforting to have photos as proof that he existed. This is one of my favorites. He just looks like he's tuckered out after a hard day of kicking mommy with those amazing little feet.

Day 3: Self Portrait "After"

Four weeks after Julian was born, we went to Manchester, VT for the weekend. This was the first picture taken of us post-loss. I included Taison in my "self-portrait" because I would not have been able to get through this without him.

Day 2: Self Portrait "Before"

I took this on July 17th, just a few days before I gave birth. As you can see, the old wives' tale that women carry baby boys like basketballs was true in my case. 

Day 1: Sunrise

This is a view from the nursery, with the nightlight that Uncle Taylor made for Julian.